If you’re a woman then you’re a human and you’re going to make mistakes. Your kids and your husband will frustrate you to the moon and back and you’re going to get angry, cranky and irritated sometimes, it goes with the territory. We live in a fallen world with fallen natures and it takes everything in us to submit to the God who can conquer the sin reigning deep within.

I struggle with anger. Mostly because I have a way in my head I think everything should be. When it doesn’t look the way I want it to, I snap.

I answer harshly.

I get impatient.

I want to control my life and I want it to be a certain way–my way–which is rarely the way.

I’m selfish and I think I have rights but if we are truly following Christ, we give up our rights. We tell the Lord with all sincerity, “I surrender all” until we don’t and the ugly rears it’s head. I’m slowly learning how to truly surrender–my ways, my wants, my worship, my time, my fuse, my control, my everything–to the one who alone can change me from the inside out.

We can stress over our kids being kids, silly and sometimes highly annoying and disobedient and (especially if you have boys) way too loud! Or, we can thank God He gave us the great honor of raising our children, building them into the men and women of God He’s calling them to be.

Moms are builders. It takes time to build a life, years my friend. We do the same endless tasks over and over, teach the same lessons, correct the same behavior, pray the same prayers. And we see those tiny increments of hours and days turn into months and years, because it takes a long time to build children into the men and women of God He’s called them to be, the next generation who will change the world. The ones who will be willing to extend His hands and His feet to the lost, the desperate, the depressed, the weary, the wanderers, no matter where He leads them.

I learned three important strategies that helped to change how I viewed my role as a mother when I was in the thick of it. I believe they’ll help you too:

Pray whenever you can. In the carpool line, making lunches in the morning, folding endless loads of laundry, whenever. You don’t have to rise at dawn and have the perfect atmosphere, beautiful music and a lit candle to worship God. He knows. Do it whenever you can but do it…because wherever you do it, He’s there.

Cultivate a heart of thankfulness. When you really begin to thank Him for the lives He’s entrusted to you, you’ll view them differently. It’s a long process this parenting thing. But just like a building grows one brick and one story at a time, raising a child is one day, one month, one year at a time. It’s the day-in, day-out drudgery that can get to you if you let it. No one promises fame and fortune for being a mom. We do what we do in obscurity and hope eventually it will pay off. And if Love is leading you, it will. You’ll see destiny come forth and the children you raise will change the world.

Ask for forgiveness when you snap in anger. Kids deserve respect too and when we humble ourselves, repent and ask them to forgive us it models Godly behavior. Sin is sin, no matter how old you are.

The way you love is the way you’ll live. If you really do love the Lord with all your heart, mind, soul and strength then His love will flow out of you naturally. Not perfectly mama, but naturally.

Because guess what–you’ll never be perfect and, neither will I!

Written for Strength & Song by Kate Battistelli.

Kate is the author of Growing Great Kids -Partner with God to Cultivate His Purpose in Your Child’s Life, published by Charisma House. Her newest book, The God Dare, published by Barbour Books, will release in 2019. She’s mom to GRAMMY award-winning artist Francesca Battistelli and Mimi to her 4 children. She’s been married to her best friend Mike for 35 years and lives just outside of Nashville. Kate loves to cook and blogs about food and faith at www.KateBattistelli.com. You can follow her on Instagram, Pinterest, Twitter, and Facebook.